"Don't do it, don't do it". That's the voice of my conscience telling me to not give in to my bad habits once again. Every single day I try but it does like it never works. When the thought it just consumes me and I feel like I don't control my body any longer. It's in my head and I try to get it out but to no avail. It doesn't add any advantage to me. Rather everyday I suffer because of it and yet I can't let go. I talk to myself saying I'll stop today or the next day or the day after that but alas feels like procrastination is playing a prank on me. Where do I go from here?

There's a saying that goes that if you want to stop a bad habit don't start it in the first place. Well I already started and can't stop so where do I go from here? How do I get rid of this addiction eating so much into me I feel it's part of me. I can't do without it. Or can I? Is there a way back? Can I go back to the days where it was alright and I knew nothing about this foolishness I indulge myself in? Can I be myself again? I have so many fond memories of myself before I became like this and I want to be like that again. I don't want to destroy myself and the future I envision. 
When there's a will there's a way. One day I'll get my life back together and get rid of all the ifs, buts and maybes and most especially this addiction.