I fumbled you so bad
I know I did, even though it's too late to go back
But darling, you have to understand
I was so scared
I was in too deep before I knew it
Would you expect me to know how to act?
I was so careful not to ruin us
So careful I did not realise an 'us' had bitten the dust
You were my true first love in the worst situation 
I was an open,empty book around you
Waiting impatiently for you to pick up a pen and write on me
Lest I closed myself shut
My heart was in too deep, but my actions proved otherwise 
I fumbled ,Yes, I know
Now, I am paying for my wrong decisions 
How can I take you off my mind now?
How can I stop that unconscious tug of my heart when I am reminded of you?
How can I unsubscribe from dreaming about you?
You are everywhere and in everything except the physical
I am haunted by your thoughts,your voice, your memories 
This is no romance for me 
It is rather tragic 
Because realisation happened after a dissappearance 
A wake-up call happened after i had buried an 'us'
I wonder if you think of me as i do you 
If you want us to be again
If you wish things went rightly
Or were you satisfied with our end?
The uncertainty feeds on me 
But dare I say anything?
Ashley