Depression didn’t arrive loudly.

It crept in quietly and stayed.

I spent a lot of time alone, feeling nothing but pain anger, sadness, frustration. No matter where I was, I felt suffocated. At home. At school. On the way to school. On the way back home. The feeling followed me everywhere, like a shadow I couldn’t outrun.

I felt everything all at once, and I couldn’t stop it.

I couldn’t control it.

Most days, I left home with tears in my eyes. Most days, I left school the same way. Hopelessness became familiar. On the rare days I didn’t cry, I counted them like small victories and whispered to myself, “At least I didn’t leave home crying today.”

I have always been a quiet person someone who keeps to herself. That's right I'm a crybaby, Even though I tried so hard to hold everything in. When people asked, “What’s wrong with you?” even when my own mother asked I wanted to speak. I really did.

But the moment I tried, the moment I looked into their eyes, my words felt useless. Like they didn’t matter. Like they would never truly understand. So I swallowed everything and carried it alone.

Over time, I felt invisible. Unheard.

I lived each day on repeat, existing but not really living.

Slowly, the light in my eyes faded.

My existence began to feel pointless.

I stopped talking to people. I stayed quiet. And when I got home, I went straight to my room, locked the door, and lay on my bed for hours, crying. I couldn’t eat. I couldn’t stand up. I couldn’t explain what was happening to me.

The tears came without warning. Without reason.

All I could think was, “I’m tired of being sad.”

I tried forcing myself to feel better. I tried jumping and even smiling through the pain, hoping it would fix something inside me. But nothing worked. The heaviness stayed.

And one day, a thought hit 

Is this what depression feels like?

This is Part 1 of my story, and Part 2 will be dropping tomorrow.

Thank you so much to everyone who took the time to read it truly means more to me than I can put into words.

Kindly like, engage and please feel free to share your thoughts in the comment section; your feedback would mean a lot and really encourage me. ☺️🫶🏼