Most businesses obsess over getting the sale and delivering the final product. They polish their marketing, refine their offers and celebrate when the invoice is paid. Then they wonder why customers quietly drift away, why referrals are sporadic and why word of mouth never really takes off.

The answer usually sits in the most neglected part of the customer journey: the middle. Not the pitch. Not the handoff. The during stage — the lived experience between “yes” and “we’re done.”

Sales experts have long argued that this is where loyalty is truly formed. Jeffrey Gitomer, in his widely cited work on customer loyalty, describes a “customer loyalty ladder” that tracks how people move from indifference to advocacy. At the bottom are prospects who barely know you. At the top are advocates who refuse to leave and actively promote you. In between is the danger zone: customers who say you did your job, nothing more and nothing less.

Those middle-rung customers are the silent majority in many companies. They got what they paid for. They are not angry. They are not thrilled. They are forgettable — and so are you. They may return if it is convenient. They may not. They will not go out of their way to recommend you, defend you or stay loyal when a cheaper or shinier option appears.

That is the uncomfortable truth behind the loyalty ladder: technical competence is now the baseline. Doing the job is not a differentiator. It is the cost of entry.

Gitomer’s framing is blunt. Disappoint a customer and they will tell many people. Satisfy them and they will tell no one. Wow them and they will tell everyone. The difference between “satisfied” and “wow” is rarely the product itself. It is almost always the experience wrapped around it.

Consider a simple example. A video production company shows up for a client shoot. The team is on time, the equipment works, the footage is usable and the final edit is delivered as promised. That is a competent vendor. The client might say, “They did a good job.” That is middle-of-the-ladder feedback.

Now imagine a different version of the same day. Before the shoot, the team spends dozens of hours planning: clarifying goals, scripting, scouting, anticipating problems, aligning schedules and preparing the client for what to expect. On the day itself, everything feels calm and organized. The client is guided, not rushed. The crew is prepared, not scrambling. There is space for conversation, even a shared lunch. At the end, the client says, “That was the easiest filming day ever.”

The technical output might be similar. The emotional outcome is not. In the second scenario, the client has been moved up the ladder. They have a story to tell about how they felt, not just what they received.

That feeling is the real product.

Across industries, research consistently shows that experience now rivals price and product as a key driver of choice and loyalty. Buyers say they are willing to pay more for a smoother, more human, less stressful process. They remember how easy or painful it was to work with you long after they have forgotten the fine details of what you delivered.

In crowded markets, skills are increasingly commoditized. There are countless competent accountants, designers, consultants, agencies, developers, trainers and service providers. What is scarce is ease. What is scarce is clarity. What is scarce is the sense that someone has thought about your journey from start to finish and removed the friction.

That is why the during stage matters so much. It is where customers silently answer three questions:

Do I feel taken care of

Do I feel confident and clear about what is happening

Do I feel that this company is making my life easier, not harder

If the answer to any of those is no, they slide down the ladder. They may not complain. They may even say they are “satisfied.” But they will not become advocates.

The loyalty ladder has no patience for friction that feels avoidable. It punishes confusing communication, missed expectations, unreturned messages, vague timelines and processes that make customers feel alone or in the dark. It rewards what feels smooth, thoughtful and consistent — the invisible preparation that customers cannot see but can absolutely feel.

Designing that kind of experience is not about grand gestures. It is about deliberate systems and small, reliable signals of care.

It starts before the work begins, with clear onboarding and expectation-setting. Customers should know what will happen, when it will happen and what is expected of them. Ambiguity is the enemy of ease.

It continues with proactive communication. Do not wait for customers to ask for updates. Tell them what you are doing, what you have finished and what comes next. Even a brief check-in can dramatically reduce anxiety and build trust.

It includes thoughtful touchpoints during the work itself. Are your meetings structured and purposeful, or do they feel like time-wasting chaos Are your tools and processes intuitive, or do they force customers to wrestle with your internal complexity Are you anticipating common questions and concerns, or reacting to them after frustration has already built up

And it culminates in how you close the loop. Do you simply deliver the final product and move on, or do you debrief, capture feedback and help customers get the most value from what they just bought The end of a project is often the beginning of a relationship — if you treat it that way.

When companies get this right, the effects compound. Customers who reach the top of the ladder behave differently. They stay longer. They return without shopping around. They bring others with them. They defend you when competitors undercut your price. They become an extension of your marketing team, at no cost to you.

That level of loyalty cannot be bought with discounts or points programs alone. It is earned through the lived experience of working with you, especially in the messy, unglamorous middle of the journey.

For leaders, the challenge is to stop treating experience as an afterthought and start treating it as a core product. Map the during stage in detail. Identify every moment where a customer might feel confused, ignored or stressed. Then redesign those moments with the same rigor you apply to your sales funnel or your technical work.

Protect that experience. Train for it. Reward it. Make it a non-negotiable standard, not a nice-to-have flourish when time allows.

Because in the end, the difference between a customer who shrugs and a customer who advocates is rarely a dramatic failure or a spectacular success. It is the accumulation of small signals that say, over and over, “We see you. We are prepared. We are on your side.”

When someone walks away saying, “That was easier than I expected,” you have done more than complete a transaction. You have moved them up the ladder. You have turned an ordinary customer into a loyal advocate — and that is what keeps a business alive.